To make her your girlfriend even when when she currently has a boyfriend, you have to be patient. You are not going to speed up the process by pressuring her to break up with her boyfriend. In fact, doing so can be detrimental to you efforts.
Even if she has decided to leave her boyfriend, it can take anywhere between 1 week to 4 weeks to finally truly end things with him. So remember to step back and just let her do her thing. There can be many reasons why this can take some time.
- They are living together. She needs time to find another place and move out
- Emotional blackmail. The boyfriend could be using their past happiness to blackmail her
- She needs time to get over the fact that things are over. This is just a phase
- She need to get support from her friends
- She wants some time to see whether you are going to stay around
Continue to be the guy she fell in love in the first place when she had a boyfriend. Play to your strengths and note down the qualities that she like about you. Casually display these qualities consistently whenever the 2 of you meet up.
Remember that these qualities are what you are. If you are just faking it, you might want to reconsider your life purposes and objectives and what you really want out of this relationship. Do not at this point start trash talking her boyfriend. It just shows that you are not confident with yourself. It might even trigger her to defend her boyfriend. A bad reflection of her boyfriend is also a bad reflection of herself.
Usually women will defend their boyfriends no matter if they are breaking up or not. It doesn’t matter whether he beats her up or leaves her alone on weekends while watching football in a pub with his friends. The fact that they are together in the first place means that she saw something in him that she initially found attractive. Women will revisit the past happiness when you put them in doubt of their relationships. This is especially so if you start trashing him.
Trust me. If you get to this stage where she has decided to leave him to be with you. Your job is done. You have taken this as far as it can go. Your best move is to be patient and wait.
There are however, things that you could do wrongly at this stage that might just change her mind about leaving her boyfriend. You have to continue dating her like you have always done. Cooling off your relationship and passion with her is a legitimate cause for reconsideration on her end. Doing so and you will be displaying traits that you are not really worthy enough for her to end a legitimate relationship for. Also do not use third parties like her friends to pressure her to take quick action. Let’s face it. If she is someone who will end the relationship slowly, she will do so at her own pace. Haggling her directly or indirectly to speed things up will not do anybody any good at all. Do not get friends involved.