How you use your voice is absolutely the most important part of any conversation, not just with a woman, but in regards to dating, especially with a woman. If you speak to a woman and you speak very slowly, barely able to get a couple syllables out per minute you are not going to capture anyone’s attention.
In fact what is more likely to happen in this case is you will bore whoever your conversation partner is into a very slow comma then be required to call the Emergency Services so they can be taken to the hospital. How embarrassing if you have to tell the Emergency Service Technicians you bored the person into a dull slow comma. The EMT’s better be very careful around you so you don’t cause them to drop off from boredom either.
On the other hand, if you speak so quickly you are often asked to repeat yourself and maybe you also find people often need to take some type of headache medicine directly after speaking with you maybe it’s time to slow things down a bit. Remember, it’s not a race to the finish line; your point will still be waiting for you when you get to it, and just because you talk faster than a moving train does not mean anyone understood what was said.
What if you speak so softly the rest of the world has to get up really close to you just to hear you? I simply hope you have excellent breath mints most of the time and are not a fan of either onions or garlic in your food. The problem here is you simply are not being heard at all, you might have a ton of great ideas and be a wonderful person to get to know, but you aren’t allowing yourself to be known because you are way too quiet.
The flip side to this of course is that person who is so loud when they get up at a wedding to give a toast; the microphone is taken away from them. Are you this person? Why are you so loud? The world does not need to hear what you have to say, just the room you are in or the person across the table from you, no one else.
Why is it so important to work on your voice? That answer is actually really simple, if your voice isn’t pleasant and appealing to others, in this case especially women, you are going to be shut down very quickly. Even better if you have a masculine manly tone. In fact I would be really surprised, if you possess any of the problems listed above, if you actually have captured the attention of a woman who doesn’t also possess these problems, or any woman at all.
Fear not though, you are gonna get some help here, so let’s discuss the reason why you need to have a pleasant and appealing voice. First, and most obvious, a person who has a voice that has the right rhythm and tone will keep your attention must better than anyone else. It is that simple, but there is also a lot more to explain.
When you speak to a woman, or anyone else, you want that person or group to feel what you say is important and worth listening to; and this must come across without being loud and obnoxious, or too soft and meek. By having a good voice for others to listen to you will be able to exude confidence not only in what you are saying, but also in yourself. This will go a long way when trying to attract and have a conversation with a beautiful woman.
Identify the Problem
The first thing you must do, which you have now done is identify what the problem actually is, you can ask your friends or relatives help you identify the problem. You might be really surprised to find out what they tell you too. Just like if you walk out of the restroom with toilet paper hanging out of your pants, or have a very visible booger in your nose, it would be nice if someone would tell you, but most of the time people won’t tell you just to be polite, but once you ask the floodgates open.
After you get over the hurt feelings of wondering why your friends and family never told you’re that your voice had a problem in it, it’s time for some action. If you feel your friends and family can help you to fix the problem, let them help, if not you have to do it on your own. The first thing you need to do is record yourself so you can actually hear your speech.
If you have some help, the best way to do this is to ask them to record you at times when you wouldn’t know they are recording you. By doing this you will get the most accurate and honest picture of how your voice sounds, and what the problem possibly is. Be sure to ask them to record you at different times of day, in different settings, with different people around.
It will also be very helpful to you for them to document the situation when your voice is recorded. For example, if it’s early in the morning, how does your voice sound versus later in the day? If your voice is better early in the morning, you need to find a way to try and duplicate that voice for use later in the day voice.
Another example is how does your voice sound if you are introduced to strangers; does your voice change, get faster, slower, softer or louder than normal when you meet someone new? How about if you meet someone new who you know is important, whether it be a business person such as the head of your department who you have never met, or the President of your company, how does your voice sound when you meet these people?
So far we have had you having some help with your voice, whether it be a friend, family member, or a coworker, you have had some assistance so you would not know when you are being recorded, but what about if you try and do this yourself with no help at all? The best way to do this yourself would be to set up the device you will use to record your voice, and forget it is running.
This might be difficult at first, and you will probably be tempted to check it often to see how you are doing, but remember the old saying “the watched pot never boils”. This rings true here as well, if you think about the recorder running you are more likely to adapt your voice to what you know will sound right instead of catching the actual problems you are having. Because of this, you need to set the recording and let it go, put it somewhere you might not see it or think about it and make sure you can be immediately busy so you won’t think about it again.