Setting the Scene
Understand first of all, there is an unbelievable amount of opportunity to win a first date with a woman out there; it is really up to you to get out of your own way and actually make contact with a woman in what might seem like an unusual place.
The bars and clubs are all so overdone and really are kind of a safe haven of overconfident men and women, most of the time you would be competing with several other men for just one woman, and what sets you apart from the other guys at a bar… not much really.
However, in some everyday settings, most you probably would never have thought of, you can actually make a connection with a woman in a personal way and hopefully leave the scene having set a date for at least a phone call or coffee.
1) Coffee Shop
Now maybe on our short journey on the bus, there wasn’t a woman who struck your fancy, not to worry, there are plenty more places and approaches coming up.
Let’s say you got off the bus at a coffee shop; this is a great place to at least get a conversation started. Coffee shops have turned into work zones for many young professionals who enjoy getting some early morning work or reading done while drinking their daily cup of coffee, but you can certainly interrupt this a bit to strike up a conversation.
Once in the coffee shop, and having ordered and received your coffee, you don’t want to seem like a stalker by not ordering, if you see a woman who seems to pique your interest, but she is busy reading a book or looking at her computer the simplest approach is to walk up, excuse yourself and ask about the item she seems so interested in.
Be sure to inform her you saw how interested in the item she is and are looking to buy a gift for a friend or relative and just wanted to get an opinion. This approach should get the conversation started and shows her that you are shopping smart, trying to get some first-hand information before buying. This may also get her thinking, your friend or relative must have similar tastes to hers that you were able to see just by looking at her.
If luck has it that you have arrived at the coffee shop while it is very busy, the first question should of course be whether or not you can share her table. If accepted, this puts you right in front of her to start up a conversation and hopefully leave with her phone number or possibly a date set up for the very near future.
Scared yet? You shouldn’t be, this is easy stuff and the key here is the difference between the locations I am giving you and approaches and the bar/club scene is really two things; 1) the quantity of competition, in these scenarios there is none, and 2) the ability to make a personal connection, in the bar/club scene there is none. Let’s continue our bus tour to a different location, all aboard, wait, that’s for trains, oh well it applies here too, toot toot.
2) Clothing Store
How about if you took your bus ride and stopped off at a clothing store, what should be your approach? First, I hope you didn’t choose a discount clothing store like Wal-Mart or K-Mart; a great place would be a local mall that has several middle to upper scale stores inside. If you did choose a discount store, turn around, get back on the bus and go home, you are done for the day.
However, if you chose wisely, a nice scale store with good quality clothes you may continue. Once inside the store maybe you spot a woman, who again, instantly makes you want to get to know her better, one of the quickest approaches and surefire ways to start a conversation would be to ask her about fashion. Don’t just walk through the doors bolt up to her and say “What do you know about fashion?”, then its pepper spray time for you my friend, let’s be a little smoother than that.
First look at some of the selections of clothing and choose a few you actually might be interested in, then work your way toward her, not directly but checking out a few items along the way, and when she is very nearby then ask her what she thinks of the selections you have made. Hopefully she will give you some good advice and start up a conversation with you about how you would look in particular items. If luck has it that you have chosen a store clerk as the woman of interest, make sure you actually buy something that she suggests.
3) Post Office or Bank and Long Lines
So far our bus hasn’t really taken us to any “errand” type locations, but how about we travel to a post office or bank for our next stop. How do you really approach a woman there, wouldn’t they think you are just being a bother since most people going to the post office or bank are really just there to do their business and move on? Almost sounds like using the restroom, but a bit nicer.
There is at least one good suggestion I can make, because, as a hopeless romantic would say, you never really know where you will meet the right person. One thing you can do is ask the woman you want to talk to for some assistance with your task at hand. If you are mailing something that needs a box, maybe ask for help finding the right size, or at the bank finding the generic deposit slips. Many times she will offer to help you which gives you the opportunity to introduce yourself and start a conversation. It may seem a bit lame, but an opportunity wasted is an opportunity lost, so give it a shot.
Another possibility in the post office or bank, really anywhere that requires a person to wait in a line, and the line has gotten long is to jokingly complain about long lines. Don’t be obnoxious about it to the point of making the clerks working there uncomfortable, but lightly talk about how many people must be out performing that particular task at the same time.
Something that takes the attention off the business for having the long line and puts it on the line itself will do the trick, and hopefully she will get a bit of a chuckle out of your comments on the line. Again, don’t go overboard with it, just enough to get a conversation and introductions started.
Many people find elevators uncomfortable and tedious, so starting a conversation in an elevator will need to include how you feel about them. Don’t be afraid to offer maybe that you are afraid, or just really don’t like the close proximity, especially if someone who enters smells bad or, God forbid, passes gas. This will give you a great opportunity to compliment her on how nice she smells and hopefully share a few laughs about elevator stories.
Before you reach the floor either of you will be exiting the elevator at, you should have her laughing and hoping to enjoy another elevator ride with you. You will most likely have to make a few of these conversations with her in the elevator in order to set up a date or get her phone number, but a little work can be worth it in the long run, and you will be able to accomplish your mission.
Are you getting the idea now of how many real possibilities are presented to you daily if only you take a chance, aren’t afraid to put yourself out there, and hopefully use a few of these suggestions? The opportunities are endless, but we are going to explore some more, so hang on to your hats, we’re going for a bit more of a ride.
5) Organic Food Store
Let me preface this one by saying if you don’t normally shop at organic food stores going there just to meet a woman is a bad idea. People who frequent organic food stores usually know what they are doing and why they are there, so if you are not a regular shopper, don’t go, it will only lead to embarrassment and disaster.
However, if you are a normal connoisseur of organic food and know how to shop at an organic food store, it can be a fantastic place to meet a woman. One thing you can be sure of, if she is shopping at an organic food store she already shares a quality that you value, eating organically.
What is the approach here, can you approach a woman in the food store and not look like a stalker? Absolutely; one way to begin a conversation is to make sure you are close by and compliment some of the choices she is making. That doesn’t mean hover over her every move, store security will surely be called on you then, but at least act like you are shopping in the same aisle and make a few positive comments.
Another approach here would be to ask her how to prepare something that is a bit unusual. In the organic food stores there will be a wide variety of unusual items to try and prepare different ways. Hopefully she will know how to make something you have chosen. A clue to success here would be to discreetly peek in her basket, then choose the same item she has there. Most likely if she picked it out she will know how to make something with that food.
Both of these approaches may seem a little far-fetched, but certainly worth a shot and who knows, you might surprise yourself and complete the mission at hand by asking a couple questions.
Are we done yet? Not even close. Like I said earlier there are an infinite number of places and situations where you can meet a woman, you just have to have an open mind and realize most of them are everyday situations that you are in all the time. Get back on that bus and enjoy the ride some more.
6) Hair Salon
Are you crazy enough to try and meet a woman where you get your haircut? Why not? Just keep a few things in mind. First of all, if you normally get your hair cut at a shop geared mostly toward men, you are probably not going to meet a woman there, and conversely you will stick out like a sore thumb at a salon that usually caters to women. However, if your regular place, or even if you choose to try a new place, is generally unisex in nature your chances are pretty good.
Similar to the laundromat, when in a hair salon you are kind of trapped there until the service is completed. This has been an advantage for you throughout our mission so far, so why not keep working with it.
Make sure you sit down next to the woman who strikes your fancy and pick up a magazine. Introduce yourself to her and start browsing the magazine for hair styles. Make a few comments on some, and if she responds to your comments be sure to ask her a few questions. You could ask how she thinks you should cut your hair, and give advice on hair care. Be sure to compliment her hair style, and if she is planning a change make positive comments regarding how you feel the change will make her look.
There will be lots of time for conversation so there really is no reason you won’t leave with a phone number or a first date set for a meal or coffee; mission accomplished. Does this seem to be getting any easier; are you seeing a pattern to the approaches? I have more for you though so get back on the bus and let’s head out for some more.
7) Bookstore or Record Store
Along our bus route, we decide to depart the vehicle at a bookstore or record store, and you see a beautiful young lady you would like to get to know much better. Starting a conversation in either location is fairly similar. In both cases you need to ask for advice. As in earlier scenes, do not act like an oversexed, or in your case maybe undersexed, crazy person, browse the shelves, notice what she is looking at and make your move.
In the bookstore one of the best approaches is to ask for advice on buying a book for a girl. Mention the girl in mind is a relative, a sister, niece, or cousin of some sort, and mention the relative has great taste in books just like the woman you are talking to at that moment. This is a great way to pay a compliment indirectly so she doesn’t put up her guard against you. Make sure you make some nice conversation, and you can even make a date to have coffee later in the week.
At the record store, you can absolutely use the same approach as at the bookstore, but there is another option I would like to advise on. Again you are not to act like the crazy stalker that brings out the pepper spray party, but browse a little first. Once you are near your intended target, you can ask her what she thinks would be a good selection of music for a party. Compliment her selections, and if you feel you have spent enough time with her during your conversation, invite her to the party, of course you are going to have a party, and that will be your first date with her.
8) Flea Market
If you decide our bus ride journey should bring you to a flea market for the day, enjoy the day. Enjoy the interesting array of items available, the people as they look for great deals on unusual items, and take it all in. If you do spot an interesting woman who you want to meet, the approach is similar to the record or book stores.
Browse a little, check out what she is looking at and make some interesting comments about it. If she happens to have an item in her hands she has purchased at another booth, ask her where she found it. Make some positive comments about how nice or unique the item is, and how much you would like one for yourself.
Maybe she will actually show you where it was she found it, and you will then have your opportunity to begin a conversation, and maybe even a shopping partner for the day. If that’s the case, bravo, mission accomplished, just make sure you get her phone number when you part ways for the day, along with an appointment for another date.